you have a lifetime before you, I'll adore you, come what may

[intheruins]

The child is a boy, just as Serena told George from the start, small but stubborn as his mother and determined to live.

She names him for his father – the father he's unlikely to ever meet – and gives him her maiden name as his middle. She figures it's the last chance she has for her family's name to live on, long after the rest of them were lost to her.

A week or so after she delivers him she's told she can leave the hospital but he's not ready, yet, and that's a reality she doesn't easily accept. If she were back in North Carolina instead of this strange, forward place, she might have more sway in bringing him back to the apartment that she's been assigned, but neither the doctors nor nurses will hear any of it.

So she leaves the hospital without her son – a day after Mother's Day, of all days – watching him through glass before she heads on. She'll be back in the evening, she tells them, although once she's outside she's not sure where she'll find the strength. She has two scars, now. The one burned in her back and one on her belly, each telling a story of survival against all odds.

Nothing to her name except a few clothes the nurses had given her and an envelope that has cash, a key and the strangest phone she's ever seen, she lingers outside the hospital for a few minutes before asking for help hailing a cab. Someone tells her it's 2017 (a fact she's still struggling to believe) and to use something called an app.

For the first time since she was a young girl, covered in ash, Serena feels totally at a loss.

[Dated Monday, May 15. Find Serena either outside the hospital or arriving at Chelsea Cloisters.]

Comments

[doeinbloom]

Even though Lily now lives in the country, she finds that she still Apparates to the city on an almost daily basis. Groceries, stuff for the house, stuff for the garden she's planning in their backyard - most of what she needs is to be found in the city of Darrow itself.

She also likes walking around the city, aimless, and with a cup of tea in hand, just taking in the sights. There's something romantic to be said for feeling so small and surrounded by concrete; she'd felt the same way about London.

She's passing the hospital on one of her walks today when she catches sight of a young woman outside of it, looking a bit lost, she thinks.

"Hello," Lily says, having no qualms about walking right up to a stranger who might need help. "Are you alright?"

[intheruins]

All right is the furthest thing from how Serena feels. She's in pain, reluctant to take the medication prescribed to her, headed to her new home without her baby and with no idea if she'll ever see her husband again.

It's overwhelming. She's not used to feeling so out of control.

Not that she'd tell all of that to a perfect stranger. "I'm trying to find my way to Chelsea Cloisters," she says. "I'll need a car. I'm unable to walk very far at the moment."

[doeinbloom]

"Okay," Lily nods, taking a moment to consider how she can help this young woman. "Did you just get out of the hospital?"

"I can call a cab for you, if you'd like," she offers. "That you can take to Chelsea Cloisters. If you don't mind the company, I can ride along with you, if you would like?"

She wonders, with the woman mentioning she can't walk, if she is necessarily supposed to have left the hospital.

[intheruins]

"This morning," Serena says. She doesn't want to reveal all of the details but sooner or later they'll speak for themselves. "I had a caesarean about a week ago."

At the offer of a cab, she nods, relieved that there's no mention of some app she needs to call for it. If it's simply a matter of dialling a few numbers she can probably do it herself, but the company is probably needed. "And if you wouldn't mind. The doctors mentioned needing help but I'm afraid my husband isn't with me."

Nor her son, just a few floors up but feeling an age away.

[doeinbloom]

Lily's eyes widen when the woman mentions the type of procedure she'd been admitted to the hospital for, startled, but also sad, in her own way, missing the son she's left behind.

Still, she doesn't let the shock of it affect her for overly long.

"I'm sorry to hear that you don't have your husband with you," she says, reaching into her own purse and pulling out the Muggle contraption she's come to rely upon so much these days. "This won't take long."

She quickly proceeds to call a cab before placing her phone back in her purse. "No problem. Have you just gotten here?" She guesses.

[intheruins]

"The same day I had my son," Serena answers. A blessing and a curse all at once. She's not sure if the child would have survived had she awoken in the mountains. They have much more advanced technology here. The doctors don't make guesses, they find answers.

But they don't have Pemberton, and Serena doesn't know what she's going to do without him.

"I arrived in labor. It's been... an awful ordeal."

[doeinbloom]

"Merlin," Lily mutters to herself, shaking her head. She could only imagine the trauma of giving birth while arriving to an entirely new city away from where one is supposed to be. "Well, I'm glad you found your way to a hospital, though I doubt it makes any of this less shocking."

Lily nods, sympathetic. "I can imagine. Is your son still in the hospital?"

She guesses he must be, if this woman doesn't have him with her. She doesn't want to think of the alternative possibility.

[intheruins]

"They won't discharge him yet," Serena answers. She understands the reasons behind it but that doesn't set her stubbornness at ease or make her feel like any less of a failure. She ought to be able to care for her son on her own. "He was born early, too small."

Back in North Carolina, a lot of children wouldn't have survived being born so soon. Prayer and wives' tales were used where medicine is here. "They say he's healthy but his lungs aren't quite developed."

[doeinbloom]

"Oh, well, I hope he has a speedy and thorough recovery, while he's here," Lily tells her, sympathetic. She knows how much it always pained her whenever she had to leave Harry behind, whether for a date night with James or to an Order meeting. She can imagine how the woman must feel.

"I'm sure you'll be able to see him every day though, right?" She asks. She knows if it were her son, they would have to drag her away from his bedside.

[intheruins]

"Thank you," Serena says. Though she's had doubts over the past few days, her son has proven himself to be a survivor. It's in his blood – Serena has made a life of defying odds.

At the woman's question, she nods, trying not to let the guilt bother her too much. It wasn't like she agreed to be discharged without a fuss. "They have visiting hours," she says. "There are a lot of infants a lot more ill than him in there. I told them I'd be back in the afternoon."

[doeinbloom]

"That's good, that you'll be able to come see him," Lily says softly, a little bit sad as she thinks of the son she's missed, not just once, but twice now. The first time to spare his life, and the second because Darrow seems to think it amusing to bring in families at different points of time.

She shakes out of it, just as the cab pulls up.

"I think that's our ride, if you're ready?"

[intheruins]

Serena's not ready. It feels like the moment she gets into this car and finds her way to her new home, all of this will be real. No North Carolina. No timber camp. No Pemberton.

And for a few more days, no son.

But she nods, as stoic as she is stubborn. "I am, thank you," she says, then thinks to extend her hand to shake the other woman's. "I'm Serena Pemberton, by the way."

[doeinbloom]

Lily shakes her hand, nodding. Serena seems to hold herself together, much better than Lily could have, were she in her position.

"It's nice to meet you, Serena. I'm Lily Potter."

It still gives her a thrill, to be able to introduce herself as such. Especially after everything that she's been through with her husband.

[intheruins]

As they slide into the cab, Serena can't help but wince. She's well enough to be released but that doesn't mean it's easy to move, her midsection feeling so weak after using so much strength to carry her child for many months. "A pleasure," she says in spite of her pain. "Do you know how far away the building is from here?"

[bryanzilla]

In just about a month from now, Bryan and David will be leaving the hospital with their daughter and Sawyer's new baby sister with them. Unlike today, where Bryan has to leave alone while David heads back to work right after their surrogate's more recent prenatal appointment. The only thing he's carrying is a terrible cup of vending machine coffee that finds its way into the nearest garbage can once he's outside.

Sliding his sunglasses on, he reaches into his pocket for his car keys. Noticing the woman standing nearby, Bryan almost disregards her completely until he does a double take and realizes it's freaking Jennifer Lawrence. Or someone that looks like her, anyway, because he's been in Darrow long enough to know how that whole thing works.

"Hi," he says with a friendly smile after becoming painfully aware that he's maybe stared silently a bit too long to not say something. It's then that he notices the envelope. That, combined with the fact that she looks a bit in over her head, makes him think there's a good chance that she's new. "Sorry, are you... Do you need help finding something?"

[intheruins]

On the camp not many of the men spoke to Serena. If anything they did their best to avoid her. Once she'd proven herself as decent with an axe as any of them and capable of taming eagles in addition to that, it seemed they hadn't known what to do with her.

Which was fine by Serena. She'd never been fond of idle conversation and the only words that had meaning to her were her husband's.

Here, all she has is her son. And grateful as she is for his survival – and whatever magic brought her here so that he could survive – she's lonely. And lost. So when a stranger asks her a question, she betrays her instinct to brush him off. "I do," she says. "I need to find my way to Chelsea Cloisters, only I haven't the slightest clue how to use the phones they have here."

[bryanzilla]

When the first thing out of her mouth isn't something self-deprecating or obnoxiously relatable, there's a slight wave of disappointment that washes over Bryan. He doesn't let it show, though.

"Oh, that's actually not too far from here. Do you need a cab?" Not that anything is really all that far from anything else in Darrow when compared to the real world, but it's closer than some places. "Did you just arrive? ...here?"

[intheruins]

"A little over a week ago," Serena says. Had she any choice, she would have left the hospital days ago, but she doesn't have that kind of sway here. Certainly not enough to mean that she's not headed home alone, a situation she hasn't had to deal with since before she met Pemberton. "A cab and directions would be wonderful," she says. "I've just had a child, I'm not supposed to walk very far."

[a_littlefaith]

It's been exhausting lately, with everything Beth has to do, but she still finds the time and the energy to stay at the hospital as long as she can before receiving word Serena and her son are both going to be okay. Beth isn't family and she thinks the nurse who tells her could get into trouble for it, but she knows Beth is the one who'd come in with her and so she murmurs the information in undertones, which comes as a relief to Beth.

She leaves, but comes back every few days, wondering if she should stop by the train station to pick up Serena's envelope. The same nurse tells her she already has it and Beth somehow manages to show up every time she's sleeping, but eventually, about a week later, she finds herself with a day off and she's determined to actually see her. She brings a sandwich from her favourite shop and some clothes, because she doesn't know what Serena will have when she finally gets to leave.

It's a surprise to find Serena just outside the hospital and Beth hurries over to her, clutching her bags. "I almost missed you," she says breathlessly. "I didn't know how much longer they were gonna keep you."

[intheruins]

The first time, Serena had been surprised to hear that Beth had visited. She'd stayed by her side until she was at the hospital and then ordered away when they'd prepared her for surgery, but Serena's not really used to being cared about.

Not by anyone who isn't Pemberton.

She's slept a lot of the time away – it's easier than being awake and alone – and told more than once that Beth had come by again. With guilt she'd wished that someone had woken her, feeling the rare chance at a genuine friendship slipping from her.

So when she's trying to figure out how to get to where she needs to be outside of the hospital, she can't help the smile on her face at the sight of a familiar other. "For the rest of my life, it seemed."

[a_littlefaith]

"You look like you're doin' better," she says, pleased with that. "And one of the nurses told me your little guy is okay, too. I know she probably wasn't supposed to, 'cause I'm not family, but I was really worried about you guys and she saw that I'd come in with you."

She hopes Serena doesn't mind. Her concern is genuine and she really only wants to be sure they're both going to be okay.

"I brought you some clothes, too, 'cause I wasn't sure what they'd be able to give you once you got out," she says, hefting the bag with another little smile. "But it looks like they got you covered there."

[intheruins]

"No, no, I'm sure these are better suited than what they've given me," Serena says with a shake of her head. Not that she isn't grateful, but she'll be even more grateful when she's able to shop for the styles that she's used to.

Even if it might be a while before she's able to afford to. She doesn't have Pemberton's lumber legacy to support her love of silk blouses and nightgowns and scarves.

But she's been poor before. She'll adjust. "And I appreciate your concern. I've been told George will be ready to go home in another week or so."

[a_littlefaith]

"George," Beth echoes with a bright smile, unable to help herself. "What a great name. I can't wait to meet him."

She speaks with the assumption that she will, because she was there on that first day, she was the one to help Serena and Beth has a tendency to take to the people she helps in Darrow, to want to be there with them no matter what they go through. The idea of helping someone and then just drifting away without the slightest interest in how they're doing is an impossible one as far as Beth is concerned.

"Are you headin' to your new place?" she asks curiously. "If you want, I can help you find it."

[intheruins]

"Thank you. He's named for his father," Serena says, pointed but not impolite. She doesn't want to talk more about Pemberton right now, or maybe ever, and trusts that Beth will sense not to ask. "He's... very fortunate to have people who already care for him here."

It's still something Serena's coming to terms with. She knows that there were people who worried about the outcome of Serena's pregnancy back on the timber camp, but this feels different. Beth doesn't seem to fear her. Beth doesn't seem intimidated by her. Beth might even like her.

"I could use the help, if you've got the time. I don't even know how to use the phones here."

[a_littlefaith]

Beth takes the hint well enough and doesn't ask, not right now. Serena has only just arrived and Beth remembers how she'd felt herself in the weeks following her own arrival, how disoriented she had been, how much time she'd spent missing her family, torn between wanting to tell everyone about Maggie and wanting to never have to think about her again. And she hadn't been pregnant on top of all that.

"Sure," Beth agrees with a smile. It's why she'd come, after all, to visit Serena and to give her a hand if she can. "You got your phone, though, right? In your package? I can show you how to use that, too, if you want. I had to get used to 'em, too, we didn't really have anything like it back home either. What building did they put you in?"

[intheruins]

"Chelsea Cloisters," Serena says, something she's committed to memory. She doesn't feel like she should move into anywhere her kidnappers have arranged for her but it isn't as if she has any other choice. She and her son will need a place to live.

"A nurse tried to show me how to use it to take some pictures of the baby but I don't remember the half of it," she admits, digging for the phone and passing it over to Beth. There's nothing on there but the number for emergencies, the number to call if she needs to speak to her midwife and then two or three shaky photos of George in her arms, both of their eyes closed.

[a_littlefaith]

"Oh, sure, I know where that building is. My friend Kara lives in there." Her friend Supergirl, although she can't say that last bit, so she sticks with just calling her Kara for the time being. That's how Serena is going to be most likely to meet her anyway, especially if they run into each other in the halls of their building and Beth has sworn she won't share Kara's secret with anyone. It's too big, too important for her to do anything like that.

"C'mon, we'll get a cab and-" Beth cuts herself off, throwing her arm up and giving a wave so one of the nearby taxis turns in their direction, but she's not speaking anymore because she's looking at the phone in her hand, at the slightly blurred photos of Serena and her new baby, and Beth would swear her heart is just melting.

"He's perfect," she says, smiling down at the pictures just as the cab pulls up beside them. "Wow, Serena, he's adorable."

[intheruins]

"Thank you," Serena says. She almost goes to go on to say that he looks just like his father, the same dark hair and blue eyes, but holds back. She hasn't been able to look at the photos, even once she figured out how to on the device.

It feels strange and wrong to be heading in the opposite direction of her son. Almost like she's failed him, even if she has no other choice. Even if she plans to return the first opportunity she can.

Sliding into the cab first, she puts her bags at her feet. "I can't wait to bring him home. I have so much I need to buy."

[a_littlefaith]

"Jeez, yeah," Beth says as she gets into the cab as well, then leans over the back of the seat to tell the driver where to take them. "I mean, that's true of any new baby, but back home you got all that time to prepare and here it's like you gotta start from scratch all over again."

They have some stuff from Judith, stuff she's sure Carl won't mind parting with if someone else might get some use out of it.

"We might have some stuff you can use," she says. "Judith is pretty big now, so she's grown out of a lot of her clothes and she doesn't need all her baby stuff anymore."

[intheruins]

"Oh, that's very kind of you," Serena says. She's not usually one to accept charity – she'd spent so many years on her own – but here she doesn't have much of a choice. "I have some money that they've given me to buy the essentials, at least."

That she can't simply nurse has complicated things in a way that she wasn't prepared for. Not that she was prepared for any of this. Even back in the camp, she was supposed to have weeks before the baby was born. "I wish I had his bassinet from back home. I can't imagine finding anything like it here."

[a_littlefaith]

There must be something special about the bassinet for her to wish for it here, something personal, and Beth has to resist the urge to tell Serena that sometimes things can arrive from home. Sometimes those things aren't so nice and they don't have any control over what arrives and what doesn't, so she doesn't want to give false hope and make her think there's a good chance the bassinet might end up here.

It might. But Beth figures, at least in this case, it's better to be pleasantly surprised than disappointed.

"Was it passed down through your family?" she asks. "We had some stuff like that when we were little. Stuff my grandparents had kept and then gave my mom when my older brother Shawn was born."

[intheruins]

"Not my family, no," Serena says, shaking her head. Everything they'd had was reduced to ashes in the fire that took their lives. She doesn't even have a picture of her parents.

She can't say whether George looks like her when she was an infant, because there's nothing left from when she was born at all. If not for her memories of her family, they might as well have never lived. "My husband's. He had it imported. It was very... special. He was very excited to have a son."

She says nothing about the fact it would be his second. The law didn't acknowledge a child born out of wedlock and nor will she.

[a_littlefaith]

"I'm sorry," Beth says, wishing there was some way she could make that easier, but she knows there's nothing. She can't bring Serena's husband here, she can't even bring some of her familiar things from home, and she wants to help, but she knows that isn't the way go about doing it. Darrow may be her second chance at having a real life, but she knows it isn't perfect and it takes just as much as it gives.

"I know it's not the same, but I'm happy to help you look for some things," she offers as the cab pulls up to the apartment building. Beth doesn't always have a lot of money to spare, but she pays the driver without question, then opens the door to help Serena out. "There's a lot of stuff here, too, that you'll be able to buy that might not make sense. I can help you figure it out. I mean, some of it anyway."

She has no idea how to work a breast pump.

[intheruins]

Serena doesn't even have a chance to pay for the cab before she's being helped out of it, and it makes her feel strange. Back in North Carolina, at the timber camp, there weren't any richer than Serena and her husband. If anyone were capable of offering charity, it was them.

Reluctant as they might have been. Nobody got rich by giving away their riches, after all.

"They gave me some things," she says. "Enough for a few days. Some... they called it formula. My milk never came in."

It shouldn't bother her but it does, another thing she has to deny her son.

[a_littlefaith]

For all she loves babies and wants children of her own at some point, that's something Beth has never even thought of and it gives her pause as she considers it. That's why formula exists, or at least one of the reasons, but she's just never thought about the reasons for it before now.

"The formula will be good for him," she says. "The stuff they make now is full of all kinds of nutrients, he'll be gettin' everything he needs. I can show you where to get more and we can look up baby stores so I can help you find the closest one."

The internet isn't going to be familiar to her, after all, but Beth is happy to help wherever she can.